Lost in You
by ReahEveBlack
Summary: The girl of Hollywood Carlison Cullen is back in Forks for Christmas after a tragic break-up with her fiance. Seth Clearwater, who imprinted with Carlie years ago, heals her, leading everything to drama, mystery, and love. R&R, new story, new plot.
1. Flights and Farewells

**So I recently went into a twilight phase, where I had some good ideas that I couldn't get rid of, and I know I have other stories, that I need to finish… But I have all these good ones right now and I will go back to those very SOON! (: This chapter was created over the time span of six Grey's Anatomy episodes. Read and Review, this is my favorite story idea I've had. **

**Here's the summary:**

**Carlison Cullen (Unlike her twin sister Renesmee) loves the spotlight, she's the IT girl of Hollywood, made a great name for herself and have millions of screaming fans to prove it. She's been like this since she was 14, but now she is 24 and Carlie was just dumped by her almost husband after being engaged for seven months. She finishes her world tour and goes back to Forks for a little while. Carlie remembers bits and pieces of her last years in Forks when she was 14 of Seth Clearwater, who imprinted with her and has been in love with her since. But it was an unrequited love. Carlie preferred floppy haired celebrities who have more money than Bill Gates and drive fancy sports cars, not a werewolf who got a full ride to UW and just started his medical internship at some hospital in Washington. His delayed aging makes him look about 25. This is a story of how unrequited love turned into much more. (:**

Forks Washington is a small town that I grew up in. I'm the daughter of Edward and Bella Cullen and instead of marrying prematurely like Renesmee and Jacob I became a super-star. With millions of dollars and fans and everybody loving me.

The flight from New York to Washington was roughly twelve hours and I didn't sleep at all, despite it left at eleven at night. I hadn't been sleeping lately, it was too hard. I'd been with James Pattinson for three years, since I was 21. He was there when not everyone was, and when he asked me to marry him I hadn't even blinked my eyes before I said yes. It was going to be in spring, and then…

He dumped everything.

To the media we said it was mutual, but I was shell-shocked and heartbroken. I had a tough demeanor, I didn't let people in very often and when I did I fell hard and fast in love with those boys. We never even fought, we agreed on everything, he never cheated and I never blew him off. We were perfect for each other.

Or so I thought…

So I was going to spend a few weeks with my family, for Christmas and New Years. I needed some unconditional love right now. And my family always had love for them to spare on me.

Emmet was the first one to give me a hug when I got off the plane, it was a big hug, one that left me breathless but inside me was singing. The Esme kissed my forehead and said I was looking a little thin, but I was beautiful as always. They were the only ones there and when I asked why there was no entourage she said they were making breakfast for Nessie, Jacob and they're kids Elsie and Eva, me, and of course, my Dad's best friend, Seth.

Great.

My mostly vampire family was cooking. I smiled on the outside but cringed on the inside.

Seth.

Fantastic.

Not.

I could see me and Seth being best friends, but friendship wasn't enough for him now that I was older. He had loved me since he saw me for the first time, but he never appealed to me in that way. He was always there for me when I needed a shoulder to cry on or someone to get me into a rated R movie but, when he kissed me three summers ago right before I started dating James, and right before we were about to go cliff diving. It scared me.

Because he was a good kisser.

It was like he was made, just for me. His lips were warm and soft, just how I liked it. He held my waist and I was mortified when I kissed him back, my fingers looping into his cute floppy hair and pulling him closer.

When I pulled away I didn't waste a second, jumping off before I could do anything stupider, like kiss him again.

I hadn't talked to him since, my Mom, whenever we talked told me he was still single and quite the doctor prodigy.

When we pulled up the house was alive with sound and light. There was an undeniable glow to the house, like it was full of something more than lots of people and delicious food. **(I should explain Carlie is less vampire than Nessie. She eats food, but still ages at a slower pace. She can manipulate other people's abilities, like if she touches Edward's arm, she can read the minds of everyone for about an hour, but it wears off eventually.) **

I walked into the house and was hugged and kissed and smiled at.

It was bliss, to be gone for so long and to come back to the same thing you left with. The love of everything and everyone you grew up with.

We had waffles, bacon, orange juice, cantaloupe, watermelon, and more. I haven't eaten that much in a long, long, long time. I haven't eaten very much at all in the last month; food didn't taste as good anymore and I wrote songs and played my guitar for hours, sometimes skipping breakfast, lunch, and dinner all-together.

Seth said a few things to me, like the jersey dress I was wearing looked good and he liked the new strait across bang cut I got last week. I smiled weakly and made small talk with him.

After things were cleaned up and I had hugged everybody and talked to them for a while, I walked down to the basement and onto the back porch. There were these wicker chairs that were so comfortable, it was winter so I pulled my thin cardigan around me tighter and just watched the sun.

A little bit after I came outside the sliding glass door slid open, I was about to pat the seat next to me because I thought it would be my Dad. But it wasn't it was Seth.

"Hey," he said, standing by my chair

"Hi," I told him back, not wanting this to be awkward at all

"So, how's New York? I heard the just got dumped on by snow."

"It's cold and snowy there, but it's good. It's definitely my favorite place in the winter time. How've you been Seth?"

"I've been… busy. They work you like a slave as an intern but it's worth it. Completely and totally worth it." He replied, smiling big, he was always so happy, I had no idea how anyone could do it.

"Oh, so you like it there? How do you eat the Hospital food? I can't stand it!" I told him, recalling the day Nessie went into Labor with Elsie for nineteen hours last year, I had to eat some sandwich that made me throw up and I remembered just now that Seth was the one that held my hair while I puked my guts up, because

I hated the smell of Hospitals; it smelled like death and antiseptic.

Human blood disgusted me (And right after I ate the last bite, Seth and I walked past a hospital room with blood all over the floor. That's why I threw up in a trash can.)

Hospital food is revolting. Always will be.

Childbirth has made me faint twice, so I hate that too.

I'm scared of Hospitals, because Death is a constant companion

"It's not that bad, the chocolate cake's prime. But I still won't touch the soup." He laughed

"Mmm, sounds delicious." I joked, shivering; I swear it was getting colder

"You're cold Car? Here" He sat down and scooted pretty close to me, he was _so warm_. I scooted closer and closer. Until I was practically sitting on his lap, I hadn't realized how cold I was until I was leaning against 107 degrees. He was warm and when I was so close to him, I felt so safe, I let him slip his arm around me and I put my legs up on the glass coffee table and just closed my eyes and let myself feel this good for a little while.

I must have dozed off for a little while because when I woke up my watch said it was four and I was asleep on Seth, I leaned back against him again and thought to myself:

I couldn't understand why I had fallen asleep on him. He was Seth Clearwater, the boy who was in love with me and was always there. No matter what. But I didn't love him; I liked how warm he was, and how easy it was to fall asleep with him beside me. But love is a tricky thing.

Something I don't immerse myself in unless I'm completely sure I'm ready to get lost in it. But was I ready? To let someone in completely again. Was I ready? Maybe.

No way. I wasn't. Not yet anyway. But it would be soon.

Sooner than I anticipated.


	2. Snow and Starbucks

**Hey, I'm back. It took a while to write but here's chapter 2! (:**

**Disclaimer: I don't own in any way Twilight or the characters used in the story except for Carlison. And the Taylor Swift song used below is completely her property. Not mine. I just used it because it fit and I liked the mood it created.**

**Read and Review!**

My body looked just the way I wanted it to. I though as I stood in front of the full length mirror in nothing but a lacy bra and panties. Or more of what my manager and personal trainer wanted, but that didn't mean I didn't like my toned abs (six pack baby!)

My height was over average, five eleven and I could still grow, I was skinny, right now 122 pounds (part of a tiring diet that worked very effectively. I didn't eat anything, and when I thought I was going to faint I ate a cube of cheese. I had stopped the day I came here, my parents would…freak out if they knew my habits for a skinny body.) I had Elizabeth Masen's eyes, the bright green gem like quality of my Father's Mother. My hair was the exact mix of Taylor Swift and Miley Cyrus. Long, semi-thick, brown, messy, and had some defined curls, but most of the time it settled for wavy. And the full lips on my face were the color of fresh blood. I got the pale skin and seven freckles laid their home around my cheeks.

I heard voices downstairs and thought it was probably time to eat breakfast. I pulled on a pair of slightly ripped skinny jeans, my purple NYU sweatshirt, and a pair of signature silver glittery TOMS. I braided my hair loosely on one side and bushed mascara ad eyeliner on.

Good it was almost ten and I had gotten coffee yet. I wasn't ever fully coherent until 12:00.

"Mownin Untie Gaga!" squealed a very messy Eva, I ruffled her hair and kissed a part of her cheek that wasn't covered in chocolate donut. I snatched a wet wiped and cleaned all traces of the treat off her face.

"Why, Hellooooo Eva!" I replied giggling as her brown eyes went wide.

Suddenly there were arms around my leg; I looked down to see a very blonde Elsie. We often joked that Els wasn't Jacob's kid, but the mailman's.

"Hi, Els how are you?" I whispered against both of their curls, blonde for Elsie and Red-Brown for Eva. They could be exact copies of Nessie (PALE!), except the fact that they both have Jacob's easy and lazy grin, and his twinkling brown eyes.

"Good, good, good. But we missed you while you were in Yew Nork." She said, with as much drama as a four year old could.

"New York, Els. I missed both of you too."

"We hew wif Unca Sef, he's babysittin us whiwle Momma and Dada Chwistmas shop!" Eva screamed, throwing her tiny fingers in the air.

"Santa's coming, Santa's coming!" Elsie yelped as Seth picked her up and swung her onto his back.

"Yeah, he is Els, in eleven days. Pretty soon!" Seth assured my tiny niece, right before I could.

"So how they'd get you to babysit these two today?" I asked Seth as Eva started to help decorate the Christmas tree with Mom and Dad, and Elsie watched Dragon Tales with Emmet, Rosalie, Carlisle, and Esme.

Alice and Jasper had left for Paris last night, something about a fashion show, lots of designers and Chanel was all I got out of her speedy and hyper conversation between each other yesterday. I looked at Eva trying to put the angel on top of the tree and wondered if Elsie had just gotten bored and quit to watch cartoons with the other part of the family.

Dad nodded his head and it confirmed my thinking.

She was SO much like me.

"Else and Eves wanted to come over, Nessie and Jake needed to finish shopping in Seattle, so I took them over here because they batted their long eyelashes and smiled." Seth replied, smiling at his god-daughters

"Little girl charm is hard to resist." I laughed and agreed with him

He snorted an I raised my eyebrow, asking for an explanation,

"You're one to talk Carlie, you would whisper please and no one and I mean no one ever said no to you. They said no to Nessie, but never to you. You put everyone under this like, I don't even know, spell or something. We had no choice but to grovel to your every wish and whim."

I know, I remember, I was a privileged and spoiled child. My wish was your command. But it was because from the time I was two I commanded attention, I had the biggest green eyes you had ever seen and long thin chocolate colored hair and a lisp. Could you say no to anyone with those features? Especially one who wrote songs about bunnies and ice cream cake?

Try it, I dare you, it's impossible.

"I recall frequently getting diamond earrings (something I had demanded at three, one thing Bella didn't want but Edward didn't mind as long as they weren't hoops or trampy) and custom made guitars (when I was 12.) And getting lots of designer dresses, I have like, forty Valentino's up there in my closet." _I also haven't forgotten_ _you taking me cliff diving, and you kissing me, and you teaching me how to drive a stick shift car. _

"Funny, me too, well I was wonder-"

He didn't get to finish because I had jumped up and exclaimed,

"It's snowing!"

I loved being able to write songs and relating to my fans. I loved crowds and singing and playing guitar, I love glitter and New York and full skirted dresses and shopping when it's super windy and cupcakes and TOMS. But none of that stuff even holds a candle to snow.

New York and snow are practically synonyms. That's part of why I love that freaking city so much.

But it was snowing. Hard. And it was sticking. It was wonderfully white outside.

"No way, it hasn't snowed for like two years!" Seth said, appalled

I turned to Seth; he was the only person I knew who could understand my snow fetish.

I was in my room seconds later rummaging through three of my seven suitcases for snow clothes: My new red Marc Jacobs coat, black Jimmy Choo rain boots, a knitted white hat, and some gold eye shadow, mascara, and eyeliner.

I was ready for snow!

We walked around the back yard for an hour or so trying to build snowmen with the girls and failing, but we made beautiful snow angels.

When Seth broke the news, "I have to work in like two hours, so I have to go pretty soon. The Hospital's around an hour and a half away and I have rounds." He sighed and looked away

For some very odd reason I was disappointed, I didn't know why but I felt a pang of emptiness in my chest.

Seth saw it, he brushed his thumb along my jaw line and it felt…nice. Warm, but completely innocent. Seth was innocent, he had tender brown eyes and kind of floppy but not teenage floppy hair, and he extends a helping hand to everyone. He was a good selfless person dedicated to saving sick people and on his days off he volunteered to coach soccer at the Middle school. Here's the thing about him imprinting on me- He loves me, unconditionally, and he's never yelled or even been mad at me. He's insanely good at reading Carlison Cullen.

He brings me sheet music before I say anything about having lyrics in my head, he brings donuts before I cry, and knows when to stand there and just keep me warm when I need it.

To everyone, they see us as the perfect couple. And it's true, we balance each other out, but I don't know if I could deal with never breaking up or fighting or not having any emotion but…love. I've never had a relationship like that before, and it kind of scares me. Being that committed, to one person. (I'll explain James later.)

But we aren't together because I would fall in love way to fast, and I don't think either of us would fall out of love. And I hate Washington as a place of permanent residency, and I would stay here when I wasn't doing press junkets or on tour. And I would be stuck just like my mother in a state that suffocated me for fourteen years or so. With a boyfriend who makes the best chicken noodle soup for colds in the whole entire world.

I will not grind myself in to hell (a synonym for Washington.)

"I'll be off tomorrow around 12, come to the rez at four; you haven't seen Jake and Nessie's new house yet. It's awesome." He reassured me

"Okay… I thought you lived in Seattle?"

"Fife, it's a smallish town a half hour out of Seattle, neighbors are nice, houses are big, and everyone knows everyone. It's nice."

"Ah, okay well Bye…"

We walked back to the house and got the kids inside with hot chocolate and coloring books. I walked to his car, it was cute, and he drove a 2010 Nissan Altima, Seth bent down and kissed my cheek. It was quick, but it didn't stop the tingles (yeah I know, I never got chills from James kissing my cheek!)

"Bye Car, see you tomorrow." He said as Seth got in the car and drove away, I meant to tell him to be careful, but he was gone in a second, the words still hanging on my lips.

It was late, probably 2 am and I was up listening to the quiet noises of the movie on my flat-screen, Easy A, my favorite movie. Ever.

Suddenly I had a song in my head; my hands itched for a way to write down the thoughts in my head and the melody bombarding my ears. I couldn't find a paper so I settled for a napkin and purple marker. I wrote down the lyrics on the crumpled up thing:

Long were the nights when my days once revolved around you  
Counting my footsteps, praying the floor won't fall through  
Again  
And my mother accused me of losing my mind  
But I swore I was fine

You paint me a blue sky  
And go back and turn it to rain  
And I lived in your chess game but you changed the rules everyday  
Wondering' which version of you I might get on the phone tonight  
Well I stopped picking up and this song is to let you know why

Dear John, I see it all now that you're gone  
Don't you think I was too young to be messed with?  
The girl in the dress cried the whole way home  
I should have known

Well maybe it's me and my blind optimism to blame  
Maybe it's you and you're sick need to give love and take it away  
And you'll add my name to your long list of traitors who don't understand  
And I'll look back and regret how I ignored when they said run as fast as you can

Dear John, I see it all now that you're gone  
Don't you think I was too young to be messed with?  
The girl in the dress cried the whole way home

Dear John, I see it all now, it was wrong  
Don't you think 19's too young to be played by your dark twisted games  
When I loved you so  
I should have known

You are an expert at "sorry"  
And keeping lines blurry  
Never impressed by me acing your tests  
All the girls that you've run dry have tired, lifeless eyes  
Cause you burned them out  
But I took your matches before fire could catch me  
So don't look now  
I'm shining like fireworks over your sad empty town...

Dear John, I see it all now that you're gone  
Don't you think I was too young to be messed with?  
The girl in the dress cried the whole way home  
I see it all now that you're gone  
Don't you think I was too young to be messed with?  
The girl in the dress wrote you a song  
you should have known  
you should have known

don't you think I was too young?  
You should have known...

By the end I was sobbing, completely flat out crying and it was all because some stupid boy I was supposed to marry broke me into pieces and I had to put myself back together. The door pushed open and shut, it was my Dad. I lay on the bed and bared my soul my head on his lap, while he wiped tears away he said this was normal and then he read the lyrics and his fists clenched and unclenched a bit.

"You're not perfect Carlison. You pretend to be happy, and giggly, and perfect. But here, at home, you don't have to put on a show, we're you're family." Then he added, "We love you without the stage make-up."

"I know, but when you put that make-up on everyday of your life, it becomes routine, and you stop knowing what you look like without it."

We talked for a while, me and my 17 year old Daddy. It was great, I cried off all my stage make-up and for those two hours, as we watched Easy A, I was just me. Just…Carlie. Not Carlison, not Ms. Cullen, or even Carlison Cullen. Carlie.

I woke up and needed a shower, I felt hideous with my puffy red eyes and ratty hair and un-brushed teeth.

After forty minutes in the shower, blow drying and straitening my hair, putting on mascara, eyeliner, cover-up, and a grey shift dress, paisley tights, Chanel boots and a knitted purple beret I was ready for business, or seeing Seth. But it was 9:00.

I needed coffee.

Not brewed from a french press kind from downstairs. But Starbucks. Real Coffee.

I picked up my iPhone and dialed his number.

"Hello?" he asked

"Hey Seth it's me I am in desperate need of Starbucks, so I was thinking that I could drive to Seattle because I need to finish shopping and if you wanted I could just pick you up on the way there at you house."

"Okay, so you are driving here, getting me, going shopping. This is all because you need Starbucks?" he laughed for a minute

"It's a serious addiction, I need it or I will get a massive headache and be bedridden for the rest of the day. It will be terrible."

"Okay, sounds good, but be super careful. The roads are a bit icy and it's a long drive from there to here. Got it?"

"Sir, yes sir!"

"Seriously Car, if anything ever happened to you I don't know what- just…be careful and don't go to fast like you usually do. I have to go, rounds are calling! Bye Car."

He hung up.

I got into my car (BMW M6, it was the closest thing I had to a baby.)

"It's a party in the USA!" I sang to the up-beat lyrics of the Miley Cyrus song, I was going 70 mph and I had good control until…

I hit black ice and slammed on my breaks, and turning my wheel to hastily and the car went around in two full 360's we were off the road and I saw the trees, we were heading straight toward them and I accidently hit the gas instead of break and I heard a sickening crunch, glass shattering and blood dripped down my face and my ribs and ankle were pounding with pain.

I grabbed my phone dialed 911, said who I was, and where I was and she said help was on the way.

I fell into darkness's warm embrace.

The paramedic's help was a blur, I remember screaming,

"Seattle Presbyterian, take me to Seattle Presbyterian and tell Seth Clearwater I'm there, that's where he works!"

I had to repeat it several times before I heard her say okay.

Then I slept, there was pain, and terror. And I fell into black.


	3. Needles and Net Weight

**So this took a while to write but I'm really happy with it and the plot really, really, really shows in this chapter! This is one of the building blocks in the fanfic so I want some reviews this time! Come on, I work really hard and no one tells me anything! Oh well, enjoy the chapter, I love my readers… If I have any? (:**

Then I slept, there was pain, and terror. And I fell into black.

_In the haze, there were around twenty people, everything was black but I saw faces and bodies. The faces were horrible, distorted but full of gnashing teeth and soulless eyes. They were whispering, all of them at the same time, trying to be louder than each other. I ran, but couldn't escape, there whisper-yells were too loud, and then there was pain. White hot pain as if I was being burned, I felt was wet, there was no water and my hands were covered in red. I screamed but there was no sound, just whispers and sharp teeth, and blood, and fear. I tried to throw myself down, but there was no floor, I was falling…_

My eyes shot open then shut again slowly. I felt hands stroking my cheeks and hair.

I was in a bright room, with scratchy sheets, and dead silence.

I squinted at the harsh light before someone started to talk,

"Carlison Renesmee Cullen." Seth growled at me, "70 miles an hour on a road covered in snow and ice, with music blaring? What happened to keeping yourself safe? Do you have no sense of self-preservation? What the heck? Who does that!"

"Apparently me…" I muttered to myself, Seth heard me.

"You have a severe concussion, 6 stitches on your forehead, a broken rib, and a fractured ankle." He stated, "Looking at all of this I have no clue how you called 911, and remembered to tell the paramedic I worked here. Why weren't you more careful honey? You promised me."

"I'm awful at keeping promises. But I'm sorry, really I am. When do I get to go?" I asked sitting up, then I saw it in my arm. Holy crap and IV. In my freaking arm.

I screamed like a banshee and grabbed the tube to rip out, I was milliseconds away from yanking it when Seth's hand came down on mine and gently but forcefully pushed it away.

"Hey, now. Come on, it's okay." He coaxed, like I was a very small child

I whimpered, feeling faint, the blackness was calling; I was going to pass out again. That would be okay, right? My head lolled on the pillow and my breathing was shallow, my eyes closed most way, and for a minute I was asleep again and I heard whispering… Then someone shook my arm roughly.

"You lost a lot of blood, you need fluids, I'll talk to the doctors but I don't think you'll get it taken out today."

"I WILL DRINK AS MUCH WATER AS THEY WANT, GET THIS FREAKING THING OUT OF MY ARM!" I screamed

I started to hyperventilate as thoughts of long, thin, sharp needles entered my mind. The needle was probably probing my veins and draining my life before my eyes-

"Car, I'll go get your doctor."

Later after me screaming, crying, hyperventilating, and trying to bribe the doctors and nurses with hundreds of thousands of dollars they all told me the same thing: no. The needle would not leave me until tomorrow afternoon when I could be checked out.

I cried that I couldn't move my left arm.

Seth rolled his eyes away from me he didn't want me to see this I assumed. He called my parents, and family, and talked to a hysterical Nessie. Seth assured he would sleep at the hospital-he did it often enough-and stay with me. Probably just to make sure I didn't offer a half million to the swing shift nurse-only because she would have agreed though.

They put me on sedatives and my eyes slowly drifted off to a beauty pageant in Texas.

My shoulder was being jostled. I shrugged them off; if they were going to stick a needle in my arm I was going to ignore them. I felt like sleeping.

Seth sat down on the bed and began to tickle my back.

Dear God. Why? This was my weakness. I pulled my gown up more and he placed his hand on my back and waved his fingers around. It felt so _wonderful_. Nothing could be better than this, and as an added bonus he gave me tingles.

Ah, perfection. There were more sedatives; I said in the back of my mind, they were making me loopy. I pulled Seth down right next to me, his face in my hair and my body pressed _right_ against his. It was cold in the room and Seth was always warm. He nuzzled his nose against my cheek and I swear I almost kissed him.

But of course I fell asleep.

"We're going to do an exam, in room eleven," said Dr. Kevent; I was a good sport for everything now that the needle was out of my arm.

"Sure," I complied to the fifty-something man

They measured me, 5' 10 ½, tested hearing my hearing, my eyesight, and then they took my weight.

When I stepped in the scale is measured one hundred and nine, drastically underweight. Last time I had weighed myself I was 122? I was trying to stay that size too, ever since the other hospital visits, I wasn't going to relapse, and it didn't even make sense, I wasn't purging. I was eating normal, healthy meals every day. I snacked too, a few chips after lunch, a cupcake after dinner. Sure, I ran a mile or two a day but that only took like fifteen minutes. Why was I losing weight? It didn't make sense at all.

The doctor sat me down right after that.

"Carlison, I know that being a person of your status can bring certain pressures. People are expecting you to act and look a certain way, but you should know-"

"I'm not trying to lose weight." I told him, not too harshly, but stern enough that he knew I was telling the truth, "Ask Seth, he sees me eat, I don't shove anything down my throat afterward either. I honestly do not have any clue why I weigh this little. Last time I weighed one-twenty or so."

"Hm, very interesting Ms Cullen… Well you need an MRI and then you can go."

The nurse led me to the machine and it started going. I heard the doctor whisper to Seth,

"She weighs 109 pounds. You can see her ribs, and her legs look like it skin stretched over her bones with a tiny bit of meat. I don't think she has an eating disorder, but as a doctor, I would advise you talking to her. I get the feeling she trusts you more than you think." He finished as the machine beeped, signaling it was over.

Then Dr. Kevent looked at his watch, "Oh I have surgery in fifteen minutes. Carlison the scans finished, you can be discharged at the front desk. It was very nice to meet you."

He shook my hand the brandished three blank papers sheepishly, "I know this is very unprofessional, but my granddaughters adore you. And I was wondering if I could get a few autographs."

I signed my name and then wrote I loved them and to be themselves always. Fans made my day, but I was sick of the Hospital and wanted to leave ASAP.

Papers were signed and they wheeled me out of that place twenty five minutes later. Finally.

I was almost asleep when we turned the corner onto the freeway and Seth started to talk to me.

"So, Carl, I talked to the doctor and he told me to maybe mention-"

"That I am dangerously underweight and that it is a safety issue when bones are prominent and I wear a size 0 in pants. I know, the funny thing is, I wasn't trying to lose the pounds this time either."

"You heard." He asked

"Yup."

"Maybe it's just me, but you made it sound like this wasn't the first time you were this skinny."

"Because it's not."

"Would you care to elaborate?" Seth looked at me, I gazed into his deep coffee colored eyes, momentarily dazed, and I nodded and began.

"I was anorexic." I replied, and began to tell what only the therapists knew about.


End file.
